Rob Cohen the auteur behind such hits as "The Skulls," "Dragonheart," and several episodes of 80's television favorite "Miami Vice" is returning to a series that has been quiet like a dormant volcano. Last we heard Xander Cage was killed in Borneo, or so the single line answer to the "where is Vin Diesel" question of "xXx: State of the Union" had us believe. Turns out Vin will be back for the third installation of the xXx franchise titled "xXx: The Return of Xander Cage."
He has copied career moves from all the great action stars. He is bald (Willis), it is hard to understand his speech (Stallone), sometimes tries to take serious roles to show off his range (most of 'em), and even tried his hand at kids movies (Arnold). But now he is back where he belongs, mindless plots that have been drawn out to the point of exhaustion (5 "Fast and Furious" movies...really?), some espionage elements that people really don't care a lot about, and explosions galore. Summer movie season won't come soon enough.
Absurdist Roland Emmerich has decided unfortunately to take a break from what he does best, which are modern (or ancient) disaster movies with little to no regard to the laws of science and nature, to make a political thriller. "Anonymous" will be about who actually wrote the plays of William Shakespeare. How is he going to bend this into an end of the world scenario? Where are the exaggerated natural global threats? Roland buddy, why didn't you just make your great post-apocalyptic sequel to 2012...oh wait, someone else already made "Waterworld." Maybe next time.
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